It’s a good idea to know what you are working toward before you even start the conversation. In practicality, compromises will need to be made. Will they stay with you and in your house? And where’s your dream list for custody, will you have all the holidays with the kiddos? Dream lists are a good starting point as long as you recognize those are the most ideal. What do you think are the most important consistency items for the kids?īefore you broach the subject of divorce with your spouse, think about your dream list for your kids. The first step in the healing process is being realistic with yourself about how much or how little you still love your spouse. In fact, if you still love them but don’t feel that love reciprocated then you might act out in hate when what you really want is to be valued. Don’t feel like you have to hate the person. There are tons of reasons to get divorce and it is very common for people to be in love while getting a divorce. Are you sure that your life would be better or you would be happier without your partner? Visualize what life would be like without the presence of your spouse in your everyday life. Would you really be happier without your partner? Before you focus any attention on what your spouse could be doing better, bring the mirror up to yourself. Nobody has a magic wand but this question should lead you down the road to some self discovery. If you had a magic wand, what would *you* do to fix your marriage? This might be through a counseling session or simply writing down your specific issues and handing that piece of paper to your spouse when you both have time to talk it out. Go out of your way to present your issues in a clear and productive way. Relationships are built on communication and it’s simply unfair to expect our partners to read our minds. Then, be honest about whether you have presented these issues to your spouse. If you want a divorce because you are unhappy, be specific about the things you are unhappy about. Unfortunately, a lot of people, and women especially, have an issue with confrontation. In this post we will talk about questions to ask yourself as well as questions to expect from your spouse: Questions to Ask Yourself before Divorce: Have you made your concerns known in a clear way to spouse? One of the things to be prepared for is the questions from your spouse. Obviously, you don’t want to blurt it out during a fight or present it as some sort of joke. When you are ready to broach the topic of divorce with your spouse, there are a lot of factors to consider ahead of time.
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